Page 21 - The Connection Bridgewater Somerville Edition, September 2012

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Back 2 School
• Rebuilding Relationships/Forgiveness
• Family Matters • Parenting Issues • Divorce
• Anxiety, Depression, Anger Management
• School Counselor for Children Through Teenage Years
Susan G olding, lcsw
Psychotherapist
Counseling in a comfortable and
compassionate private office
This Fall, Learn New Ways
To Solve Old Problems
373 East Main Street, Somerville 908.304.2228
www.therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/86646
PREPARING YOUR CHILD
FOR SCHOOL
By: Susan Golding, LCSW
Getting your child off on the right
foot for school or life means you help
them learn to help themselves. A
child needs to learn to navigate their
world when you aren’t around.
While we want our children “to do
the right thing” for themselves and
others, acting with integrity takes
practice.
It’s the home environment that is
their place to learn the rules of life;
the place where they can work out
the problems of the day, and get
ready to tackle the next; hopefully
with a greater sense of confidence
and that they have a plan to move
forward.
How you work out problems at
home, whether it is tackling a bully-
ing problem, a science project (their
project not yours), or college ques-
tions (are they looking at California
for distance or is it really the best
school for them?) is important. Help
your kids process problem solving, so
that when they are away from you,
they can meet their fears with a plan
of action. Whether it is at school, a
sports arena, a party, or college, you
want them to know how to think for
themselves.
PEOPLE WHO CAN THINK FOR
THEMSELVES CAN SET REALISTIC
GOALS, ARE MORE APT TO SUC-
CEED BECAUSE THEY HAVE A PATH
TO FOLLOW.
Let the school know you are there to
assist – first and foremost, your child
should be ready to learn. That means
being able to listen and be patient as
they are one of many in a classroom.
They need to learn to be “school
ready” and they can help in an age
appropriate way; i.e. backpack ready
the night before; food ready, i.e.
snack, lunch-easy on the sugar – kids
on too much sugar crash, they can’t
concentrate, stay awake and proba-
bly become irritable – not great for
making friends.
Kids want and need to feel they “fit
in.” They are just as worried about
friendships as you are. They want to
feel a sense of inclusion.
Parents and children need to learn
when to listen and that they are
being heard. So, when you first see
your child after a day at school or
work, turn off your cell phone for at
least 10 minutes so they get the mes-
sage that they have your ear. Believe
me, when they are teenagers, you
will be asking the same of them!
And it is respectful practice, to give
attention to those you love. So when
you teach your child they deserve it,
they can count on it, and (hopefully),
they in turn, will give it back.
Help the child to make a plan for get-
ting their work done at home. Help
them learn and get things done, so
there is time for life’s other activities.
That means TV off!! We can’t expect
distractions to help a child get organ-
ized. They have much to think
about – teachers, peers, assign-
ments, exams. Help them to sort it all
out, so that they feel they can handle
it. Help them reduce distractions so
that they can concentrate.
Don’t let them start the day with
stress. Together put clothes out the
night before, get up with enough
time so that there is less anxiety. Ten-
sion may lead to yelling, and that’s a
horrible way to start the day.
We can control a few things in life,
and do try to do those little things
that have a big impact on “being
school ready” because something
unexpected is bound to happen, and
hopefully, with your guidance they
have the ability to think for them-
selves, and know they can handle it
because they have a sense of confi-
dence that comes from a secure
place called home.
 
O F B R I D G EWAT E R
(Home of 13 medalists at the 2012 Summer Nationals
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